Starbucks Rage: What is it?

I feel for disabled people, all of my community are on disability, of one sort or another. The problem is that being on SSI is a lifestyle; ‘how to milk it’ spreads like wildfire, from one disabled con artist to the next. A lot of what people say about the homeless being leeches is true, but, what are their options in life? Certainly they are not in a position to make a productive contribution to society, or even a living; or they would not be on disability. Their participation must be counter culture, and that means joining the underground of subversives and racketeers. SSI pays just enough to get into a cheep room, or to eat: it does not pay for both. So, naturally disabled people have to have more money, and are all about getting it. They are good at draining dry any resource who happens by. I have a policy that worked for Jesus, “Neither a borrower, nor, a lender be.” I try not to have any financial transactions with homeless people. Not because I don’t understand how much they need the money, but rather because I understand that once you open the door they will never stop knocking on it. That is their career, what choice do they have? So, I never give and I never receive from anyone in the homeless community, including the Charities. O.K., so I brake my own rules occasionally, but I have a fall back rule; if I brake Rule Number One; No Giving, my punishment is that I have to stay away from the person who I gave to for one month. It’s inconvenient but I deserve to be inconvenienced, and it is the only way to break the ‘gimmy game,’ habit before the giver becomes a total target for exploitation, by the receiver. The biggest tight-wad on the planet was Milton Friedman, figures. He had a house next to my lawyer’s house up north. He chased me for years, I thought of him as a creepy old guy who embarrassed everyone with his stinginess. However, I highly recommend stinginess toward the disenfranchised, or you too will soon be the disenfranchised. Homeless people know all of the rules of being mean, for example, there is a homeless guy sitting across from me, at Starbucks, right now, he came up to me with a gift of a tea bag, (which does not seem mean to the casual observer, but), he tells me that with a little hot water and cream I’ll have a delicious free treat. Here is what he knows (that he thinks I do not know): If the Starbucks staffers see you ‘bring your own,’ they then have the police find a reason to make sure that you leave and never come back. To my diabolical homeless ‘friend’s’ way of thinking, he has put a tea bag on my table; cuing the barista who eventually glances in my direction, that I am an undesirable who brings her own. My homeless ‘friend’ will come back with a cup of hot water, bummed for me, from the barista; who then politely pits herself against me; empathizing with the homeless guy who intimated to her that I made him fetch the hot water for me. Mr. Diabolical will then tell me to try the tea with cream, (knowing that) when I go to the condiments bar for cream the baristas will put me on the Starbucks deadbeat list, and kick me out. The police all come to Starbucks for coffee (because the baristas are cute) those cops will be informed about me and my eviction for leeching. The homeless guy and his friends will laugh about putting a nail in my coffin; toward an arrest. Never turn your back on the ocean; never let your guard down around a homeless person: screwing you is his career.

None of my homeless ‘friends’ know where I live: I live with them, on the street, and have for 20 years, as far as they are concerned. I always throw the tea bag away, and order the most expensive coffee on the menu; the very second that Mr. Diabolical, or any number of his friends, pull that trick on me, which is why it has never worked. It does work on all of their acquaintances who stupidly indulge homeless people, by graciously accommodating their seemingly innocent attempts to be fawning and nice. Homeless people are not humble, or kind: they are mean, as are all people who are mistreated as a class. By the same token people who think that the maid doesn’t spit in the tea that she serves, are dead wrong. -Carolyn Phillips

I gave the bank account information for the book: ‘The Jabberwocky,’ to several homeless people, as recipients of the proceeds from the sale of the book on this is what I know; they will figure out that the bank account stays empty until they learn to market the book: A better career than panhandling. They are fast, they are smart, they are diabolical; success is a given. I can afford to be ‘outsmarted,’ we all can, if it means a better society to live in (in the long run), a society with fewer homeless people. Anyone who is depicted in The Jabberwocky (available at is welcome to be a signer on that bank account. -Mrs. Wyatt, VP Treasurer, Wood Family Trust


Angelique responds

We have a Starbucks at Stanford:

I’m not saying that having an Apple Air makes you stupid, but it does put you in a class with screaming baristas, so wired up on caffeine that they don’t know where they are, much less that they are not the center of the universe. Clueless, they blithely squawk on, and on, and on, as if anyone among their captives is attempting to listen. And there you sit, with your peers, scrolling though the ‘touch pad pond,’ head in ‘the cloud,’ as if anything out there isn’t gooey glamour, and gutless glitz. It’s an illusion; a magic show; an act for fools swimming in swill; dimwits who think that because it smells good it must not be excrement: “It’s effortless, it feels right: it must be meant to be! To thyne own self be true,” they exclaim to the heavens, adopting an eternally sophomoric epistemology. A tip for the capricious, and the easily led along, on a lark: Disruptive enough to hold the floor? It won’t make you important. The screechy shrieking moron making coffee, is probably supplementing a disability check, perhaps from a head injury sustained in an uninsured hit and run accident which failed to eliminate her entirely. Her’s is a busy agenda of annoying people while accomplishing nothing; idiosyncratic, in the eyes of all. If your job is to serve coffee, with a smile: Don’t make the job a stage play, starring you. -Angelique


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